part two

This is an extension of a previous post on friendship.

I do believe that quality friendships with the opposite sex exist, and there can be a mutual understanding that the relationship will always remain platonic. It's difficult to keep the friendship in check, I admit. In time one person may begin to develop feelings for the other. I've been there. Who hasn't?

There are those moments when you want to be more than friends with someone, you want to date them. In Christian circles this seems to always be the gray area, and I think it's partly because we complicate things too much for ourselves. The impression I get from some people is that if a guy is interested in a girl he should man up and ask her out. Another voice I hear is if a guy is interested in a girl he should take time to get to know her. As a friend.

So what we are left with is a dilemma: In one hand there are guys who want to get to know a girl because he wants to date her down the line, and in the other there are the guys who want to get to know a girl because he thinks she'd make a good friend.

But what about when the girl is interested in the guy? Recent discussions about the topic have given me some thoughts. These thoughts I haven't drawn out to any conclusion, however.

I think communication is always the most important factor, it just seems to be the timing that's the issue. As one good friend put it, a guy simply doesn't go up to a girl and say "hi there, my name is blah blah and I'd like to get to know you for the intention of dating you" right off the bat. That is a bit creepy. (And if you are a person who's done this, uhhh, cool?).

This may turn into a part three, because I still find that I'm trying to define where the line is between friends and more-than-friends. In spite of this topic being so confusing at time, I also find it fascinating to think about.